There are many types of abuse a person can suffer from in their life -- emotional, physical, sexual, and psychological -- to name just a few of the more common ones. But sexual abuse can often leave the most lasting scars, because of the force, threads, or manipulation used to perpetrate the unwanted sexual activity. Victims of sexual abuse often feel victimized a second time if they go and report the abuse or sexual assault. Not only is the process emotionally draining, but it takes an additional emotional toll when it's realized that most victims of sexual abuse know their perpetrators. In fact, it can be a close family member, a partner or spouse, or even a boyfriend or girlfriend. This adds another layer of pain, disbelief, and complexity to the abuse.
Many people who suffer from sexual abuse or sexual assault can also suffer long-term effects from the abuse. These effects may include post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), overwhelming anxiety, panic attacks, and being afraid of going outside or in places that remind the person of the abuse.
Overcoming the overwhelming impact of sexual abuse is something that takes most people a lot of time. A person who's suffered from sexual abuse may feel very depressed, sad, lonely, and hopeless. Many people choose to seek out treatment for these feelings, which can help speed up the healing and recovery process. Treatment most often includes a form of psychotherapy focused on helping a person understand and recover from the sexual abuse or sexual assault. In some cases, psychiatric medication to help a person with their anxious feelings may also be warranted.
The most important thing a person needs to realize if they are the victim of sexual abuse is that it is not your fault. There is nothing a person does that warrants sexual abuse (especially if it occurred in a person's childhood) or sexual assault. Sexual abuse occurs because of a problem with the perpetrator's personality, perspective, or understanding about respecting other people's rights -- they are the criminal, not you.
Need a help on how to cope with sexual abuse call +2348067468642
Tuesday, 29 November 2016
Monday, 28 November 2016
How To Flirt With Girls – 6 Dynamite Tips
Flirting with a girl without coming across as creepy can be a tough art to master. You need to say and do the right things but you can’t take it too far. The truth is there are a a couple of simple techniques you can implement which will put you light years ahead of almost all the other guys on the planet.
Ever heard of propinquity? No? Well, I am about to change your life in a major way.
Propinquity is one of the main factors that lead up to attraction. Learn and understand the process and you will never have any problems getting girls to like you.
Girls like you for you who are, and flirting is a sure fire way to show her that you’re into her too.
You can flirt with girls you’re really into, or just casually with girls who wouldn’t make it past your “friend zone” anyway.
There are several types of flirting and if you practice different types with different girls you’ll become an expert at getting to the level you want with her.
1. How To Flirt With Girls – Be Yourself
Okay, so what do people really mean when they say this?
What they mean is: Don’t be fake.
Don’t try to be someone you’re not.
Don’t be pretentious and try to show off.
What you should do instead is stick with your actual sense of humor, talk about your actual interests, and say things you actually mean.
If you think a girl is pretty – maybe you think she has great eyes, a great smile, a nice butt, whatever – there’s no reason you can’t tell her that.
But don’t be cheesy or cocky about it.
Be sincere, smile and look in her eyes, and remember that the surest way to master how to flirt with girls is to show them who you really are.
2. How To Flirt With Girls – Body Language
Showing a girl that you like her and getting her interested in you is as simple as being casual and confident.
Even if you stand straight and tall usually, find a way to lean against a wall or a chair.
Turn your body toward her, cross your arms casually, or relax your shoulders and elbows if you put them in your pockets.
Smile and make eye contact, but don’t stare or grin like a maniac.
Be friendly.
Be interested in what she says, and glance down at the floor occasionally so you can lift your eyes back up to her face.
It’ll give you a chance to look over her body casually too – which is a subconscious signal that you’re ready to take your contact to the next level.
3. How To Flirt With Girls – Language
So what do you say to flirt with a girl?
Be sincere.
You can compliment her but don’t go overboard or deliver something obvious – like from a movie or a pickup line.
Be clever and think up your own interesting things to say. Don’t curse around her until you know if she’s comfortable with it, and don’t use vulgar humor first either.
Knowing how to flirt with girls means that you’ve paid attention to the signals they’re sending out, and playing off their lead.
Follow topics of conversation that she brings up – and ask her about her.
Once you have a little idea of her sense of humor, you can start to banter with her, or pick on her a little.
Not the way you’d rip on a bro (*never* say a word about her weight! You’ll probably instantly turn her off) but the way you might pick on a sister or a female cousin.
Don’t be mean, just joke with her and let her joke with you.
Avoid using pet names or nicknames too quickly as that might put her off, but if she calls you “dear” or “sweetie” or something along those lines first, it’s a go-ahead to try and respond in kind.
4. How To Flirt With Girls – Taking It To The Next Level
So now you’ve sent out some signals and she’s sent out some.
Eyes and words have connected and bantered and your physical bodies have gotten closer.
You should try a subtle move to break the “touch barrier.”
One of the best ways how to flirt with girls is to let them know you want to be intimate, which means being close and into her.
Once she knows this about you – even subconsciously – and if she’s into you, she’ll totally be willing to take flirting to the next level.
Touching her should be casual. Find an excuse to brush up against her, touch her arm when she makes you laugh, or get close without actually touching.
For example, lean in when she’s close and smell her air – don’t be loud or noticeable – and when you pull back just smile and tell her how good it smells.
If you can, say what it smells like (flowers, rain, fruit, etc).
5. How To Flirt With Girls – Sexual Flirting
It’s tough to know when it’s okay to make sexual comments when you’re flirting with a girl.
You want to let her know you’re interested without making her think you’re a sleaze.
If she’s turned off by you all your flirting will get you nowhere. A great way to flirt without coming on too strong is to make a “double-entendre.” (French for “double meaning”).
For example, if this paragraph would have started “It’s hard to know…” you might have had the impulse to laugh at the word “hard” (It’s okay, us too).
So try to work those kinds of double-meanings into the things you say, and you’ll subtly be telling a girl that you’re interested in getting past flirting, an expert move in how to flirt with girls.
6. How To Flirt With Girls – Successful Flirting
Some girls you may be flirting with just to practice flirting, or to see whether or not they flirt back.
Because of course, if they do, they’re interested.
But other girls you may be flirting with because you’re definitely interested in taking it further with her. All successful flirting can lead to a first kiss, so if you’ve been flirting back and forth for awhile she is expecting that’s where it is going.
In all likeliness, if she’s been flirting back she wants to take it further and may have even been dropping hints in her flirting with you.
Don’t under-count how important that is!
One of the best things resulting from knowing how to flirt with girls successfully, is being able to see if there’s chemistry beyond the flirting. That’s a sure-fire way how to get a girlfriend.
… Do You Want To Become A Master At Flirting?
Now, if you want to really become a master at flirting with girls it requires learning a few special psychological techniques. Make Small Talk Sexy has an incredible step-by-step system laid out for you so you will never be confused on what to do next. It teaches you techniques that once mastered, you’ll literally be able to flirt with, and pick up, virtually any girl you want.
This guide here teaches you how to use propinquity. Master the techniques in Make Small Talk Sexy and I swear you will have girls aching to hang out with you (and more…) – within one week. Your friends will all be amazed. You will be shocked.
Love And Relationship Advice For Those Who Overlook Small And Delicate Things
The best love and relationship advice is often related to those classic clichés you see in movies or magazines. Most people tend to overlook them. They are sick and tired of hearing the same things over and over again. However, you might be surprised to find out that they actually work. Whether you are looking for Christian dating advice for men, dating advice for men over 40 or dating tips for shy guys, many rules are general. At the same time, it really makes no difference if you have just stepped into a new relationship or you are married for 15 years already.
When interested in dating without drama, most people naturally assume that there must be some secrets. Sure, some techniques are more common than others, but there are no secrets. Remember that communication is the most important element of a couple relationship, yet the couple success also depends on each partner’s availability to make some compromises. So, what are the best Internet dating tips? What are the best solutions in relationship help for men?
Manners
Who pays attention to the actual manners after a few years or even months together? You first try to impress your potential partner with perfect manner. You thank for everything and you ask nicely, no matter what you need. With time, these things disappear. Terrible mistake! Although it is a bit normal, you have to focus on maintaining the same high standards. Good manners show respect and consideration toward the ones around you. As you are nice and polite toward many people, you should never overlook your loved one. This is one of the most important love and relationship advice.
Diversity
Diversity is the opposite of monotony. Monotony can kill relationships if overlooked for too long. It inevitably ruins the satisfaction and leads to all kinds of tensions within the couple. Although a little routine can be comfortable for both partners, it is imperative to get out of it in the attempt to try out new experiences. It makes no difference if you try out a new recipe for dinner or you come up with a vacation in a new destination. When you discover new things together, emotional links become harder. Diversify your relationship along with the partner and you will never find yourself asking friends or specialists to help me save my marriage.
Common Activities
The more time you spend together and the more common activities you get involved in, the sooner monotony will kick in. It is highly indicated for each partner to have their own activities then. Deciding how to spend time together is one of the elements in a successful relationship though. If the only activity together implies sitting on the couch in front of the TV, perhaps this is the right time to look for activities that will please both of you. Dating for married people implies keeping the flame of passion active. When monotony kicks in, the flame fades away. Sure, spending too much time one away from the other is hard too, so find a middle solution.
The Way You Fight
Fights and contradictory discussions can go into two different directions. Sometimes, they can be productive for a relationship. In other cases, they can deteriorate it. Once again, the secret stays in your respect toward the partner, which should never be overlooked – not even when you are in the middle of a conflict. If both of you are hot and angry, take a break and discuss the topic once you feel calm. Always listen to your partner’s point of view before creating your own counterarguments. If both of you want to talk and none of you listens, your relationship will quickly become a political talk show.
Compromises
The secret of a successful negotiation is to give up on something that you have never really wanted or needed. This kind of situation is not so common in a relationship, yet compromises represent a solid necessity for the healthy and longevity of your connection. If your partner truly insists to take you to a theater play, then ask them to go see a movie (or whatever you want) on a different day too. There is a fine line between compromises and conditions though. Do not ask right away in return or these things will become some lists of pluses and minuses. The balance must be maintained as a bigger image and not punctually. Most tips in online dating for men recommend making more compromises than the partner.
Decisions Made Together
When making decisions in a relationship, always keep the partner’s necessities and wishes in mind as well. You no longer make decisions for yourself only (with a few exceptions though). This is one of the most important pieces of love and relationship advice. What does it mean? Simple. It tells your partner that you truly care for them and their needs. At the same time, focusing on the same problems together will lead to less effort and problems. You can solve problems two times faster. Although a particular problem may seem to affect one of you only, focusing on it together will solve it right away.
Common Rituals
Whether it comes to a common vacation in a different country or the common habit to kiss every morning, common rituals in a coupe have a beneficial effect when they are maintained with the same high level of interest by both partners. It does not mean that you have to act like a robot though. Instead, a little routine will provide a feeling of safety, while a little diversity will spice your life a little. Once again, try to find a perfect balance for a successful relationship.
Conclusion
In the end, you should know that whenever the loved one makes a mistake, you must keep things in perspective. If your partner has accidentally broken your favorite decorative item, do not dramatize. Such things will solve nothing. In the long run, people who ignore small issues tend to be happier. Also, they never need love and relationship advice.
How Strong is Your Relationship? Quiz
Instructions:
This quiz is designed to help give you some idea about the strength of your long-term monogamous relationship or marriage. For each item, indicate how much you agree or disagree with the statement. This takes most people about 5 minutes to complete. Take your time and answer truthfully for the most accurate results.
I am a year old Female / Male / Other
1. Though we've gone through some difficult times, I can at least tell my children they have a dad/mom worthy of their respect.
Not applicable
Strongly disagree
Disagree
Neutral / mixed feeling
Agree
Strongly agree
2. We were compatible physically at the beginning of our relationship.
Strongly disagree
Disagree
Neutral / mixed feeling
Agree
Strongly agree
3. If my marriage dissolved and I later saw my ex-spouse with another woman or man, I'd feel a sense of longing, sadness or jealousy.
Strongly disagree
Disagree
Neutral / mixed feeling
Agree
Strongly agree
4. If I had to explain to my children years from now why staying with their dad/mom was good for them and for me, I think I could make a pretty good case.
Not applicable
Strongly disagree
Disagree
Neutral / mixed feeling
Agree
Strongly agree
5. Even on our worst days, I know that if I were in real trouble, my significant other would drop everything to help me.
Strongly disagree
Disagree
Neutral / mixed feeling
Agree
Strongly agree
6. We have our differences but my significant other eventually apologizes if they see they've hurt my feelings.
Strongly disagree
Disagree
Neutral / mixed feeling
Agree
Strongly agree
7. We had fun together at the beginning of our relationship.
Strongly disagree
Disagree
Neutral / mixed feeling
Agree
Strongly agree
8. If my best friend or sibling were married or deeply involved with my significant other (instead of me), and things weren't great between them, I'd tell my friend or sibling to keep working on it.
Strongly disagree
Disagree
Neutral / mixed feeling
Agree
Strongly agree
9. My significant other was supportive of my personal interests and goals the first few years we knew each other.
Strongly disagree
Disagree
Neutral / mixed feeling
Agree
Strongly agree
10. My significant other makes me feel safe and secure.
Strongly disagree
Disagree
Neutral / mixed feeling
Agree
Strongly agree
5 Secrets to a Successful Long-Term Relationship or Marriage
There have been a thousand or more articles written about how to have a successful long-term relationship or marriage, but none that seem to capture some of the core ingredients I’ve found important in relationships. So here’s the straight dope, from my experience.
Before I begin, however, it’s important to dispel a common relationship myth — relationships are (or should be) easy. That is simply not true. The grass always looks greener in other people’s lives, because few people share the truth of the amount of work that goes into relationships (hence why 50% of marriages end in divorce). Relationships — even the best relationships in the world — require constant attention, nurturing, and work. If you can understand and accept the need for constant attention and work in your relationship, you’re started in the right direction.
1. Compromise
Relationships are about not only taking, but also giving. If you find yourself not giving very much, or feeling resentful of how much you give and how little you receive back, you may be in an unequal relationship where one side is taking more than they are giving.
For instance, couples sometimes mistakenly believe that “love” will help them deal with any issue that comes up, and that if the other person truly loved you, they would just do as you ask. But people are independent with their own unique needs and personalities. Just because we found someone we want to spend our lives with doesn’t mean we give up our own identity in the process.
2. Communicate
Relationships live and die not by the sword, but by the amount of discussion. If two people can’t find a way to openly and honestly communicate their needs and feelings to one another, the relationship doesn’t stand much of a chance long-term. Couples must find a way to communicate regularly, openly, and directly.
This doesn’t mean waiting for an argument to tell your significant other how much he bothers you with his throwing his clothes on the floor instead of the hamper. It means telling him when you feel the need to, and to do so in a manner that is respectful but assertive.
3. Choose Your Battles Carefully
After marriage or when two people move in together, couples tend to discover pretty much the same thing no matter who they are – that they are two different people and living together is harder than anyone ever told them. Love conquers a lot of things, but it is no match for living day-in and day-out with another human being (especially if you’ve spent years on your own).
Prepare yourself for this challenge by choosing what arguments you want to turn into a full blown battle. For instance, do you really want to start a fight over the toothpaste cap or how clean the shower is? Or would you rather reserve your energy for the discussions over finances, kids, and career paths (you know, the things that might really matter to a person). Too many couples fight and bicker over the dumbest things, especially when put into context of issues of true importance.
4. Don’t Hide Your Needs
Sometimes when we enter into a long-term relationship, we put ourselves second, behind the other person’s needs and desires. We might give up working to have a child, or agree to move to another city to help support our significant other’s career. And that’s fine, but you need to be realistic first with yourself about whether such things really matter to you or not. If they do, you need to find a way to communicate such needs with your partner, and compromise where possible.
Two people will rarely have exactly the same wants and desires out of life — that’s just a fantasy. Instead, expect that sometimes your two paths will diverge. Express your needs at those crucial moments, but always find a way to do so respectfully and with an open mind.
5. Don’t underestimate the importance of trust and honesty
Different people have different areas of concern, but almost everyone values trust and honesty from their partner above all. Why? Because your partner is the one person you want to be able to depend upon in the long-term, without question or doubt.
Little things where your significant other hasn’t been completely honest shouldn’t be blown out of proportion, because virtually everybody tells little white lies (especially when one is dating). Focus instead on the big things, like if they say they’re a lawyer and you discover they’ve never even passed the bar, or they say they like kids but later on insist on never having one.
* * *
Strong relationships are like a really good conversation with someone you admire, trust and cherish – they are ever-changing, engaging, wonderfully rewarding and sometimes surprising. But in order to continue the conversation because you want to see what the person has to say next, you have to respect your significant other’s opinion even when you disagree with it.
And just like a good conversation, you need to work on keeping your end up too. You need to show attention and nurture the relationship constantly, just as you would nurture anything you value in life. You don’t just “get married” and that’s the end of it. Indeed, marriage is just the beginning of a long process of learning to openly and honestly communicate with another person in a respectful and caring manner.
If you’re up for it and follow these tips, you’ll be on a road to having a more successful relationship or marriage. But remember — it takes two to tango. Share these with your significant other or spouse and use it as an opportunity to begin the conversation of your life.
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